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Support, help, advice & information for Multiple Sclerosis. Ask questions & share experiences with people affected by MS.


Thoughts from my bed.......

Posted by Crafty Cow , 31 October 2013 · 948 views

So...... Here I am, need to ramble, not so much rant, as I don't think I have the energy for a rant right now.

After a week or so of feeling 'good' and almost normal (although, that's subjective, as I have not really been normal since my discs prolapsed around two years ago) I have tried, during this 'normal' period to be as active as possible. I listened to my body telling me to slow down during the course of the day, which it didn't, so I cockily carried on.

Unfortunately, my back has never been right since the two surgeries I had on it last year, so instead of the fatigue and balance issues which have plagued me of late, I have instead been subjected to daily worsening crippling pain.

Now, after a bout of ironing, a couple of days ago, whereby, even the heat from the iron was making me feel ill, and not listening to my body to stop, even when I had to keep taking a break every couple of garments, I ended up in bed that very same day and slept the afternoon away.

Since then, I have encountered more painful and irritating symptoms which have at times stopped me in my tracks. Today, I have spent a majority of the day in bed. With such horrendous fatigue, eye pain, pins and needles in my arms and legs, shooting pain in my legs and back pain to boot, so I am been got in all directions.

My youngest daughter is so excited that today is Halloween, and at four years old, is more than aware of the festivities looming over the coming months. I, however, sit/lie here, with a sense of dread, that feeling like this now or at Xmas will be a nightmare. So I have made myself a pledge, that there will be no more stressful last minute stuff. I will not be running myself ragged cleaning the house like a woman possessed on Xmas eve. I will let someone else cook, even if it means that Xmas dinner is a curry.

My cockiness and over activity, has caused my back to flare up, and my over activity has led to fatigue and other issues getting it's mitts on me again. I thought, as I felt so well, that maybe whatever it is that's causing this, had gone, but how wrong I was. I tried to be positive, in lieu of the fact I have no concrete dx, but all the positivity wasn't enough to keep the devil at bay. It has made me realize, that it's not a case of mind over matter, like some neuros who can't find an answer like to hint at, but there really is something very wrong out of my control.

Luckily for me, I have another appointment in the coming weeks, so I have at least something to cling on to in terms of time. What might come of it is anyone's guess, but in the meantime, I have to go back to the Sam who learned to accept daily limitations, once more.........

Dear Sam,

I really feel for you. It is so hard when we feel a bit more 'normal' not to go overboard trying to do all the things that we can't normally.
Perhaps you will finally get some answers at your next appointment. Maybe with a positive diagnosis they can finally start trying to treat you properly.
As far as Christmas is concerned my plan is to do all my shopping online and let someone else do the cooking (and hopefully the washing up too). I think that should be your plan too.

I hope you are feeling better soon.

Gill x
Hi Gill,

Yep, thats exactly what i intend to do.

I think, unfortunately, my back is excruciating at the moment, and i may have to get that sorted asap. I have a nasty feeling that there maybe something going on with the discs again. Walking is really bad, cant straighten up and the shooting pains aswell as the pins and needles and numbness are going down both legs rather than just the left. Think inwoild rather have labour pains right now.

If wetherspoons xmas dinner wasnt so expensive , we would all be going there this year lol.

A trip to the gp is on the agenda tomorrow me thinks.

Love sam xxx
When I read the title of this blog, "Thoughts from my bed.......", I thought I was in for an erotic read!

But, this is an MS support forum, so I thought it can't be.

Sorry to read of your trials and tribulations. We never stop learning, do we? You'll get the hang of this balancing act soon.

Take care

Awwww sorry to disappoint ;-) lol
Aww its great to feel "normal" but then you get overexcited and have to pay for it. Like you say there maybe something else going on.   get better soon x
Thanks Hun xx

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