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Miss Wiggle

keeping a positive perspective

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Miss Wiggle

i'm trying at the moment to find things that are good about my life in general to help me haul myself out of the 'why me' phase of my life after my dx.

 

I'm trying to think of things that are good about having MS to help me keep positive, the list isn't very long so far though!

 

I keep a mental note of all the money I save on parking by using my disabled parking badge, that always cheers me up, particularly as where i live parking is ridiculously expensive in the city centre, but free all day with your disabled badge.

 

I'm also glad I found the spoons thing, it makes me really consider all the things I am doing and what I'm spending my spoons on. It's given me a perspective on life I didn't have before and I'm starting to realise what things are important.

 

Anyone got any others?

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happyandy

Hi Alice,

 

You get discounts on practically everything. To find out more, check out the Daily Mail to find out what the benefit cheat of the week is getting.

 

Armed with this knowledge You can get a free bus pass, council tax reduction, cheap night school courses, concessionary entry to all things arty( sometimes your partner/helper goes free ). You can get modifications to your house, grants from the MS Society, DLA from the government which you can trade for a new car.

 

Pity that you have to have a disability to get it

 

Andy


If I knew I was going to live so long I would have taken better care of my body

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shadow

Well i can say there is help out there grants ect,but there is a big bumhole about being on all the benifits is........you will never be able to better ya self without loosing the benit total ie any further money you manage to require is taken straight outof you benifits.I am still tryin to think of some thing good about having MS....erm .....ow yes if you are in the benifit system that is ok YOU LIFE WILL NEVER BE YOUR OWN AGAIN just enough is better than not enough i suppose .....get you self a begging bowl just in case yeh you never know

 

shadowxx

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happyandy

Yup Shadow

 

The benefit system should be a safety net not a way of life. Luckily I was insured prior to me getting MS and dont have to rely on the state.

 

I just had a sneaky feeling I was going to get something nasty.......

 

Andy


If I knew I was going to live so long I would have taken better care of my body

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Hezza

I can usually find a silver lining in most clouds so let's see...

  • I've got a ready made excuse / reason not to do things I really don't want to do
  • Having MS has made me reassess my priorities so I now have a much better balance in my life - my spoons are mostly used on things I enjoy and want to do and with people I love
  • I've made some fab new friends, including forum friends :winkgrin:
  • I discovered that I already had some amazing friends and those friendships have become stronger
  • Life's never dull, especially when some of my more amusing symptoms come to visit
  • I can (and do) bore people silly showing off my MRI scan pictures
  • When I do something really daft I can pretend it was my MS's fault :lolsign:

 

I'm sure there are more but it's early and my brain's just waking up so that'll have to do for now :hearts_circle:


Life is short. Eat dessert first. Jacques Torres

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shadow

Hello hezza my problem is i wanna finish wot i had started,ie every thing

 

be useful

not feel a hinderants to no one

i dont have many friends now i was very popular at one time

am i miserable NO

am i a shadow of what i was YES

am i totally frustrated YES I AM

i am still married YES I AM but it is very strained

i cannot seem to let go of the REAL ME i carry the carcas around every day

Why cant i move on...there seems nothing to move on too

I am frustrated as ever thing new i have found to do has sped past me and now i am unable to achieve it no more

ENJOY MS DESTROYS

 

shadowx

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Akorah

Hi Shadow i understand your perspective on things thinking about the things you can no longer do or find harder. But think of all the things you can still enjoy in your life. Today even though im having a relapse i still managed to take my 6 month old grandaughter to play group. I no longer work because of my MS but that means i get to spend more time with my Grandaughter Hollie and every time she smiles at me i know my lifes worth living!! I have said before everyday i do something im proud of even if its just being able to do a bit inthe garden or walk the dog im proud of myself for making the effort and if im knackered after i rest. I find i dont take things for granted no more so therefore i appreciate more!! :hearts_circle:


chelly xxx

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shadow

Hello Akora yes i agree i have nieces and nephews who make me smile and laugh yeh,i also have a dog my dog i walk every day he makes me laugh also.Everyones differant and everyone looks at the situation differantly for sure,also things for me cauld be a hell of alot worse.People will fight strugle and find things to do wot ever this disease throws at them yeh,i try maybe harder than many but i have to face things now that i thought i would never ever would have.

 

That probably hurts the most for me,i will never be able to exsist with out assistance getting dressed/making a meal for my self/showering you see akora im not after sympathy (hell no) it just seems that every year or two some thing else goes AWOL and i think some times how are ya supposed to cope???i have already said i aint after syphoney a purpose in life would be so refreshing all i seem to do is walk the dog and a bit of typing (one handed poor bugger) and frigin sleep.I have at times had outa body experience (OW MY GOD) i sort of stand and look at my self :hearts_circle: and think to my self WOT A FRIGIN STATE YOU ARE

 

shadowxx

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Akorah

Shadow i think we all have days like that your not alone and i know its not sympathy you want its understanding. I understand i know how you feel i get frustrated and angry some days. Im lucky that i have a wonderful daughter who is my carer and she is a great tonic we always said she was so laid back shes horizontal and if im having a shitty day i can always guarantee she will make me laugh some how. She has problems of her own at the moment she is married to a wonderful man whom we all love to bits but because shes only 19 and hes a foreign national our wonderful government wont let him come here on a spouse visa as they changed the spouse visa age law 2 weeks after they got married so she has to be 21. Somedays i think things could be worse at least i can see my hubby every day. Shes so happy even after everything shes going through so i just take a leaf out of her book and chill a bit lol. Perhaps you should spend some of the energy you have doing things u really love and sod all the other stuff for another day!!


chelly xxx

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shadow

Hello Akorah im glad you have help from your daughter she sounds sweet and parallel with life yeh,my wife is my full time carer and i do appreciatate wot she is doin for me......i dont feel comfortable with it myself but i have no choices at the end of the day i suppose.I take the piss outa my self for wot ever happenes in a day i dont care much if others find it amusing thats fine by me ill laugh with it no worries yeh.

 

I no full well i aint alone there are at least a 100,000 others out there some much worse and some not as bad as me,it is so frustrating that there aint alot none of us can do about it we all want are bodies and lives back ASAP yeh,compare NO I DONT never...i try and help when i cant seem to help my self if you get my drift.

 

The government and its poxy rules....im not politicle i dont vote they are all a shower of shite as far as im concerned and not worthy of my vote,the chill pill i wish i thought anti depressants would see that happen more often it seems not.OK moan/winge/cringe over AKora thanks for the reply and you take hun

 

shadowxx

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lucky

quote

all i seem to do is walk the dog and a bit of typing (one handed poor bugger)

 

if only, what an achievement which many of us would love to do - and i am sure we would try to improve the walk - make it a challenge - go one more lamp post in distance - be proud.

the dog might also need that extra post.

get a sense of humour and be proud - start to love yourself

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shadow

Hello Lucky i no many MSers would think lucky lucky person i no that yeh,did i do a boohoo there ????sorry about that then.I walk the dog the same route every day about a mile i would say yeh,ploease dont think i havnt tried other routtes because believe me i have loads of routtes.The problems are as follows where can i be by the road side and the dog on the path verge yeh/where will there be less dogs about he attacks any dog big or small if close enough to him,sound with people and kids not dogs (big deal muzzle him)I have been in situations wbhere i have been unable to defend my self and it wasnt nice so ive tried a muzzle and he got attacked i am a total dog lover and he aint no thret to any human just other dogs yeh.

 

I am visually impared in my left eye (so what) well after say an hour of consintrating on the path/looking out for other dogs and dog shit im pretty tired/controlling a electrice wheel chair when tired is easly said than done dont care what is said about it,i am/was a fighter of this disease but 20yrs on i have watched alot go down the pan and i could not do a thing about it like many MSers out there.I have fought it all the way and adapted to still do many things i cauld do before,it is the loosing things and accepting that you will never do wot ever again never that i find so hard to accept,it is like ive aged 20yrs through no fault of my own......no i dont wanna go back ive done that but it has taken 20yrs of my life i cannot forgive or forget that

 

So if this another BOOHOO i am sorry im a tad bitter at mo,i do have a sence of humour most days even its me farting that makes me laugh,start to love my self????/have you seen me my imagination doesnt stretch that far SORRY

 

shadowx

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Akorah

Hi shadow i think your a fighter whos tired of fighting just now. I can tell your normally a funny person as lots of ur comments make me giggle (the part about doggy doo!!) What you say is true and you have every right to feel bitter a pissed off. But will your anger change anything? Nothing changes anything all we have is to fight what we can and accept what we cant! Why waste the only energy we have on anger? i cant be bothered being angry any more id rather use my energy on something more constuctive. My dog is also a bit dog aggressive so i need to be carful where i take him but i use an easy leader/halti rather than a muzzle because if he got attacked he could still defend himself. I hope your depression lifts soon and you start to see the brighter side of things. :hugs2: to us all life kicks us in the dangly bits and we get up and start fighting again :hearts_circle:


chelly xxx

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shadow

AKora thanks you make sense its a shame that sense some times evades me completely (wots new) i have sufferd from depression for 11yrs now and to be honest with you if that could be taken away it would be a god send.The trouble is MS can cause/make you depressed NO NOT THE OBVIOUS but if it decides to attack that part of ya brain it will make you depressed it has been proven and not all no this (STRANGE BUT TRUE)

 

I have told that my depression is ENDOGINOUS it looks like i aint doing my self any favours :hugs2: i cant help but remember who l was before MS and the first 10yrs was a breez compared to the last 10yrs yeh.I was energetic strong and determind not to let it win so to speak,now im weak got as much energy as a 9watt bulb and as strong as any pipe cleaner.Im lucky alright compared to some that is clear to me i have met and spoken to many MSers who are in a right state some where i dont wanna go for sure.The dog or better known as Ahole,i luv the little bugger (jack russel/lion) he is my reason for going out of the house,i have tried many things to stop him being aggressive to no avail he wears a harness so i can pick him up/or did do I find it a bit like dodge city constantly lookin for other dogs,but thats him he puts up with me none of us are perfect yeh.

 

I was only venting abit rare for me,and tis refreshing to no that some one out there understands,you are right im sick of fighting some thing i cannot see

 

shadow :hearts_circle: xx

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Akorah

Hi Shadow

i should have known you had a jack russel lol so have i!! Mines called Bailey boy hes a rottweiller in jack russels clothing. I also have a 90lb rotty/akita cross called Akorah hence my name lol but Bailey boy is boss! As for your depression its hard and boredom often adds to it too. Too much time to think of what was. You need and interest a hobby or maybe even an educational course theres plenty out there you know. I fill my time at the moment trying to fight for my daughters rights i have written to the queen today lol but when thats done im thinking maybe i will learn french!! perhaps you should search the net and look whats on offer!


chelly xxx

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shadow

Hello AKora you have a russel and Rotty,Rottys i no nothing about russels OW YEH,this is my third (and last SNIFF) i used to do pest control and hunt with them for years that was what they were bred for and are at there best/hapyest i reckon.Mydog is called....any thing ya like he takes no notice lol narr his name is scampi NO NOT MY IDEA,i was over ruled by my sons i wanted BUDDY CUZ HE IS

 

To much time to think spot on,it dont help none,for the last 8yrs i have been serching for a interesr/hobby and so far like ive already said (i think) art floats my boat and i really did think THIS IS IT i will try for as long as i can to learn all i can......TAKE IT AWAY MS.I do think you have to wanna/like/challenge you self in life yeh.There are things i really wanna do like d.i.y keeping my home in order ect.

 

I am/was a hands on kinda person,manual and have a point to it,to learn a new language seems forign to me having not grasped the English language as yet and remembering another one i think i would be on a hiding to nothing,mind you i would to no wot the forigners are saying at times??OKURD AWKWARD A PRAT TO MY SELF....WOT EVER if there is no interest there why would i want to pursue it...SORRY I HAVE been there and to be honest with ya im a rather pissamystic plonker perhaps a simpleton i is,just cant find that interest and hold it in me yed.

 

Sent a letter to the queen hey.....now there is a waste of time for ya lol

 

shadowxx

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Akorah

Bailey is my second jack russel and guess what my first was called scamp lol he died 2 years ago now at nearly 16 yrs old they are wonderful dogs very loyal my vet says mine loves me too much! As for hobbys if you like art do some!! Im rubbish at painting and drawing really i dont have the patients my passion is words i like to write poems storys letters anything. Look forward to you posting some piccys u painted for us soon perhaps???? :hearts_circle:


chelly xxx

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shadow

Hello AKora i still call my dog buddy or fluff im defiant like he his lol,my last dog was called kim and shes at the bottom of my garden and was also 16 when she was put to sleep,That broke my heart 20yrs ago still have a talk to her now at times.She used to be able to switch off from ratting and be a very loving dog,put her any where near a rat smell and you would think she was a differant dog didnt mess about job done.

 

I was very creative and had a vivid imagination and thought i would be able to put that into some thing while painting maybe,alass it wasnt to be as i cannot even do a signiture or hold a frigin pen now.To do some thing you really have no interest in (i have tried most believe me) just sounds like a road to no where i feel.I have been using listening books for the last 18mths ln its self a questionable easy choice.......until you have to actually choose one???????? i like andy Mcnab (done them all on listening) Listened to things i wouldnt of dreamed of and now no why,i will do and try to listen to most things as long as it aint got a frigin barbie doll narrator sqwarkin a god dam american accent to much at me.

 

I think NO I NO i wont be postin any pictures of mine cuz there aint gonna be any done yeh,photography i had a passion for,and took many pictures of where i used to fish and the fish i caught.I thought that one day i might replicate those places in frames maybe never mind got the photos and memorys yeh.Sounds like you have got a passion for what you do and good on ya for that....

 

IF IVE COME ACROSS GRUMPY AND A MOANER TO PEOPLE READING THESE REPLYS TO AKORAH WELL IM SORRY PERHAPS YOU HAVNT BEEN THERE YET.........I HOPE YOU NEVER WILL

 

shadowxx :hearts_circle:

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Akorah

You dont sound grumpy to me you sound frustrated which if i was in your position im sure i would be too! The trick is finding something we can do not worrying about the things we cant!! There are lots of free audio books online if you like them you can choose the accent i think lol. I like gathering information the internet is a great research tool i also play games online with my friends they r great!! Gametwist is a good site it has lots of games i like ones that tax my brain some. like card games ect you can also meet some great new friends online too!!! Im sure you will find something you like and that excites you. Its just finding the time and energy to look :hearts_circle:


chelly xxx

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Miss Wiggle

ah shadow, you don't sound grumpy and miserable, just sorry you're having such a tough time. you're lucky to have your lovely dog to help take care of you. :hearts_circle:

 

i think sometimes it's easy to focus on the things we can't do rather than thinking about the things we can do, I'm sure there are things you could still do although perhaps with a few adaptations. like if you enjoy gardening you could get someone to build you some raised beds that are accessible and you can tend to those. everyone has different hobbies and interests of course but perhaps it's time to look back at some of the things you used to do and see if there is some way you can get back to doing it.

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shadow

MANY THANKS AKORAH BLESS YA

 

SHADOWXX :hearts_circle:

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Akorah

Hi Shadow your so welcome and thats what friends are for!! :hearts_circle:


chelly xxx

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