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madderbat

I'm a slow learner

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madderbat

This last week has been a real learning curve for me about how I really need to cope with MS and definitely not try to do too much when I feel alright.

 

On Monday we were having a roast chicken dinner. I normally do it on Sunday but other things got in the way. I spent most of the day looking at flooring/appliances and bits for our kitchen project and was 'getting there' until I suddenly realied the time. I had been so engrossed I'd almost forgotten about the meal and got very upset to find I can no longer juggle sixteen things at once and keep a grip We did manage to eat at 7pm so all was not lost, but it threw me completely. :juggler:

 

On Wednesday we went to Ikea to look at the kitchen cupboards and worktop we'd chosen. I had been there before, about 12 years ago and had forgotten how vast, airless, heated and generally stressful a place it is.

I rezlly don't enjoy shopping at the best of times and my 'shop 'til you drop' stamina lasted about half an hour. We did all we needed to do and I just wanted out. My body was reacting, legs trembling, head buzzing, generally saying 'Help' It seemed to take ages to get out and I began to have a vision of Hell.

By the time we got home I was bushed. :cheerleader:

 

Felt awful all day Thursday, then on Friday my son and his dad (my ex) looked at the wiring in preparation for the project and had to move the wardrobe in our bedroom, raise floor boards to follow wiring and took about 4 hours (it's an old house with at least 3 lots of wiring left in place). I tried to stay calm and keep cool, but all the 'buzzing' around affected me very badly. :wchair:

 

Yesterday I felt worse than I had done for ages, and I'm very aware that when the kitchen gets dismantled I'm going to have to live in one room and cope with noise, movement and loss of my afternoon nap for nearly two weeks. :sos:

 

I'm also going to have to learn not to try and 'help' so much. I've had lots of these 'moments' over the past few months and I really, truly, can't do what I used to, even when I feel well which saddens me.

 

Why am I such a slow learner? :stupid:


Never make the same mistake twice. There are so many new ones you can try a new one every day ;)

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Michelle

If you're a slow learner, then most of us here, are in the same boat with you. I think you have hit the nail on the head when you say it's a learning curve. Mine has been a very long one. :wchair:

 

 

Michelle <<<<< still learning to pace herself.

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Christina

It certainly takes time to learn the lesson and not to want to 'help' all the time. It's quite alien to our natures isn't it, as women, wives/partners, mums and generally all round carers? I feel bad if I'm not in there organising, helping, interfering etc and it's hard to step back and let others get on with it.

 

I went out last night on a riverboat with my husband for his annual sailing club do and I spent most of the day resting up (sort of) so I would be able to manage the evening. I've been relapsing now for about 3 months so I knew I had to take this bit seriously otherwise I would be so fatigued come evening, I would be lucky to make it and Rog would be dead disappointed not to go with me. I've been pretty dizzy the last week too and the hot weather doesn't help. Anyway I managed it but I'm cream crackered today and that's without any alcohol to blame either!! Now we're off to collect my youngest daughter from uni in London and move all her stuff out. Do I feel the least bit like doing that today - NO I DON'T but not much choice there I'm afraid. And it's too HOT!! Thank goodness for air conditioned cars! Shame my husband is a bit worse for wear - he drank my alcohol allowance plus his own.

 

So like Michelle says it's a steep learning curve and one which I regularly slide off!!

 

Chris x


Edited by Christina

Not waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain ....

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brainless

30 years on, guys, and I'm afraid I still do it!!

 

was fine before kids came along - easier to be selfish and take to the bed. But once they're there, so hard not to be there for/ with them.

 

 

common sense - not really that common, eh

 

x

 

Lottie


Lottie, x

 

LIVING IN THE MOMENT

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madderbat

I'm so relieved to learn it's not just me, thanks folks. :wchair:

 

I think it might be something to do with the 'capable mother' syndrome, I've always been good in a crisis and able to cope so it's quite a shock to find that I really, truly can't any more. I wonder how long it'll take me to get the hang of it?

 

Hope today didn't knock you for sixteen Chris, :juggler: if you're anything like me you'll 'pull it out of the bag' when needed but oh boy afterwards....!

 

Coming to terms with being a different person isn't easy and probably never will be, but it's all part of the wonderful thing called life I suppose and we live to fight another day. :stupid:

 

I've had a cooler day today, sitting inside with the fan and managed to sleep this afternoon so feel a bit more steady now.

 

Jane xx :cheerleader:


Never make the same mistake twice. There are so many new ones you can try a new one every day ;)

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Dianni

I'm on the learning curve too folks. I seem to take two (wobbly) steps forwards and at least three back! :hearts_circle:

 

It was my daughter's birthday on Sunday. All my kids, their partners and my two grandsons descended for the afternoon. It was lovely to be fair, but I did too much. I didn't realise at the time, but I paid for it yesterday and today.

 

I guess it's a case of deciding what's worth the price. If any of you can come up with some sort of formula for making this decision, please email me:cheerleader:

 

Hugs

Di

xxx

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brainless

it's time to relocate the party to one of their house's Di. that way you slip away when you get tired instead of trying to be wonder-woman..... they will all understand, you know that

 

x, Lottie


Lottie, x

 

LIVING IN THE MOMENT

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Dianni

LOL Lottie

 

Problem is I'm the only one with a garden (well Karen has a garden but a small house and 12 people just don't fit in her house in one go, plus her loo is upstairs and I can't get to it easily... well that's their excuse :you-rock: )

 

It's Emma's 21st in 2 weeks and yep, it'll be here BUT they all know how wiped out I've been so I will be sitting on my butt. (Unless the munchkins want me to play golf or help them get dry after the paddling pool lol. They are the only ones I willingly wear myself out for and oh my! It's soooooooo worth it :lol4: Does this count as learning? :rofl: )

 

I hope others are far more sensible!

 

Hugs

Di

xxx

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madderbat

I like the notion of the one step forward, two back Di, I decided on FB that I'm doing a Two-step-Tango' (friends know what I mean). Your weekend sounds lovely, but what an effort.

 

Can you create a retreat space somewhere and tuck yourself away for a re-charge in peace? My consultant is big on the 'power-nap' and suggests 10-20 minutes in a cool quiet place to do some meditation and get your breathing and thoughts settled. Just quietly allow yourself to concentrate on deep, even breathing and let everything else go. I've tried it a few times and it's not as good as sleeping for 3 hours, but it does help.

 

Hope you have a lovely time at the 21st party.

 

Best wishes

Jane :you-rock:


Never make the same mistake twice. There are so many new ones you can try a new one every day ;)

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