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jillart

Big Trouble at Work

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mayb

What is it with those back to front words Mich? Do you touch type. I do and find that one hand works faster than the other so letters come out in reverse order to my typing of them.

 

That was good advice about the short walks Mich. I collect my grandchildren from school and am just getting to know a few of the 'mums' often grans like me. It is suprising how much better a little chat can make to your mood. I don't want to make friends with people but anyone can exchange a few words like this and it makes you feel more a part of the 'normal' world around you. I am also a regular visitor at the locla garden centre. Lots of people wander around on their own or have a cup of coffee on their own in the cafe there - a suprising number of people actually use sticks too! You can lose yourself a bit in the gifts and plants without too much effort and again there is always someone to exchange a few words wtih. It does help to make you feel less isolated and 'apart' from the rest of the world. I am not saying it works everytime as I have got to the point of going out and then talked myself out of it before I open the door. It all takes time to build up confidence but don't give up if you don't make it every time.


Mayb

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mayb

Another thought JIll. I don't know if I said but I have joined the local freecycle group. Just got to freecycle.co.uk (I think) and look for a local group to join. You can offer things you no longer need but are just too good to throw on a tip. Everything is free. Anything from books to furniture goes on these sites. If you are having a clear out (so good for improving your mood) before decorating etc you may find it interesting to join and you get to have a chat with people when they come to collect. I also found that things like paint are asked for so if things are tight you can put up a 'wanted' ad too.

 

I am expecting a couple of people today to take away my 'rubbish' and it si quite exiting to see the rooms clear slowly without me having to do anything really.

 

:hearts_circle:


Mayb

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jillart

Hi everyone

 

Thanks again for being so helpful. I really got myself angry last night as I'm now so fed up of seeing the house. I REALLY NEED TO GET OUT!!! :pile: . I've decided to go to town this afternoon to a couple of shops as I can go there on the bus (hubby's got car today).

 

Mary explained it so well, I really do feel isolated and apart from the world. When I do see people I can't think of anything to say as I'm not used to conversation! This all started long before I was diagnosed as hubby has to drive a long way to work and consequently did not feel like going out anywhere at weekends. Plus he's quite content to stay at home on his computer or his guitar, but I need to go and see different places and things. I feel as if my mind is shrivelling up. I used to do art work but the MS has effected that - alongwith all the stress. He doesn't seem to see what it is doing to me even though I've explained it several times! I love him dearly but I really am so frustrated at the mo. :eeew: .

 

Also when I am working by the time I come home I am exhausted and just about do the daily housework. I think it is mentally/emotionally exhausted more than physically due to my work problems. I know it will all be a great deal better in a year when I can leave work, but I need to get through now. I am just about holding on at the mo and I don't want to blow my top at hubby. I feel I could disappear and no-one would miss me!

 

Any way - I'd better go and get lunch, my tummy is grumbling at me.

 

Bye for now.

 

:hugs2:


Life has become abstract

 

Jill (aka Smudge)

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Christina

Hi Jill

 

I hope your trip into town made you feel better for it. I know only too well the feeling of isolation you get from spending lots of time in the house.

 

Chris x


Not waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain ....

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mayb

I hope so too Jill sounds as if you needed a bit of shopping therapy - hope you remembered the chocolate!!

 

Perhaps if you concentrate on jazzing up the living room Jill (colourful cushions, a few candles and a change of pictures on the wall can go a long way) and sort out the kitchen and bathroom - major clean may be all you really need to do and a change of towels, soaps, more candles etc, you could feel able to invite people into your home for socialising. It has a few pluses in that you don't have to go out, it doesn't have to involve more than a couple of bottles of wine and a few nibbles or a barbecue (men often see this as their province) and you can colapse in a heap as soon as they have gone.

 

You can take as long as it takes to get there but it creates a goal which helps keep you moving on with the house stuff. I invited a friend I hadn't seen for nearly a year to come and stay for a weekend - I gave myself about a month before she was due. Well not everything was as I wanted it to be before she arrived but her room and the ones we would be using and part of the garden were in order by then. We had a lovely time catching up and discussing all sorts of things. Best of all we laughed a lot.

 

One job a week may be enough for now - sorting out paperwork, cleaning a wall or cupboards or a trip to the dump. I have had to make lists to motivate me but I do try not to feel down if I only get that one thing done as it is still a step in the right direction. You need a sense of achievement rather than failure so look at what you have done rather than what needs to be done. Trips to the dump are not exciting but it is going out of the house and it is lovely to get rid of rubbish cluttering up the place.

 

I know when I was working full time I was living to work rather than working to live and in the end it wasn't really worth it as I had no 'fun' left in me by the weekend. :hugs2:


Mayb

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jillart

Hi There

 

I had a lovely couple of hours in town - and I actually bought something! That's a miracle in itself :blink: . I usually look all round the shops and don't find anything. I only went to BHS which is what I intended and I made myself take a long time so I could do things gently and not get flustered. I felt really good after it although I was tired.

 

Mary, you can come round and design my lounge anytime - it sounds like you are another house doctor! :you-rock: . You've summed it all up perfectly. That's just how I feel! The main problem is that hubby and me have been in a kind of fog over the past 10 years or so and we've not noticed how bad everything has got. So it all needs cleaning or replacing. Plus we've got a big old labrador who gets a bit stinky at times, so all the carpets need shampooing. It's what to do first! Hopefully, a man is coming tomorrow to do the bathroom, once he has been I can then order a new stair carpet as it is no point getting plaster footprints all over a new one! Then the drive is going to be done, leaving the other decorating to be done over winter when we don't need good weather. I am also currently overhauling the garden so it is easier to look after - problem there is that it keeps growing in the meantime!!! :lolbash: ,

 

But you are right, we have started doing things but nothing can actually be seen yet. We've thrown out loads and are still going through stuff - boy you can collect so much rubbish over the years - it's ridiculous.

 

I'm also looking into whether my meds are causing me to be more depressed, I've started another thread on that. Also I'm trying to find little organised trips I can go on, but its all down to getting time off work. Grrrr I hate that place it ruins my life. Never mind, 12 months to go (not that I'm counting).

 

Ooops - better go again - need to get some lunch before my physio comes.

 

Bye for now.

 

:hearts_circle:


Life has become abstract

 

Jill (aka Smudge)

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Hezza

So pleased that you enjoyed your outing yesterday Jill. Maybe you could make it a regular treat? then you would have something in the diary to look forward to.

 

I am off into town tomorrow for lunch and a shopping trip with one of my friends. She's great because she understands all my little MS-ways and so nothing is ever awkward with her.

 

Take care :hearts_circle:


Life is short. Eat dessert first. Jacques Torres

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mayb

It is great to have a friend who is in tune with your funny ways Hezza - my funny ways are quite amusing to some of mine. I think they take me shopping for entertainment!!

 

I am glad the shopping trip went so well Jill - you will not be so worried about the next one. Good luck with the clearing out. Every now and then I get ready to throw things out and then find that I am finding it hard to part with if I hesitate. So now I am getting a bit tougher on myself and throwing out anything that can't be freecycled.

 

I also have a smelly dog and it is a real problem isn't it? Much as I love him- I have had the carpet replaced with laminate in most rooms. I still have the living room, stairs and landing to see to. The thing is it is so much easier to keep clean. If I can't manhandle the hoover I can sweep it with a brush or mop it. I don't like it so much as carpet which always is a lot cosier but the dog can't rip it up (yes he has done that before) and it doesn't smell.

 

If you have a room plastered Jill then be warned it takes weeks for the dust to settle afterwards and the smell can get on your chest too. Leave a little space before you have any new flooring laid and be prepared for a lot of dusting. I am a big fluffy duster fan now!

 

End of adverts!!

 

Good luck with it all you will be so pleased with it when you are done I'm sure - you may not even want to move!!

 

:hearts_circle:


Mayb

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jillart

Hi everyone - I've got more good news for once.

 

I went out on Wednesday night with a friend for a drink and we treated ourselves to some dessert while we were there. Felt a bit strange waiting for a table only to order a piece of cake! It was lovely though, a big slice of choccie cake with whipped ice cream! :cake:

 

Also the man finally came to decorate and spruce up our bathroom. So now its all gleaming and bright and there is no unsightly gap in the tiles around the new sink. He did forget to whiten the grouting, but we've got stuff in to do that and we will slowly do it over the next week.

 

We had a slight set back. He was going to fit new alcove lights for us in the lounge. When he went to fit them he realised that they did not have their own switch on them and would need to work off the main lights. This is no good to us and we don't want the whole loung re-wiring. Luckily we can take them back to B&Q and get our money back. We've found a website that does loads of lights so we are picking one from there.

 

I am feeling much more positive and feel we have made steps towards the future. As for moving, it is not the house I want to get away from - if I could lift it up and move it nearer my friends - then I would! Unfortunately, I'm a bit groggy today as I was cleaning the bathroom and floor after the work as there was fine grit over everything, and my mop broke, so I had to reach round the loo etc and have started my arm off tingling (which is why I have a mop!!!) :fear: . Hopefully, if I am careful today it will subside.

 

I am also off to see the new Harry Potter film tonight :squiffy: , so everything is happening at once!

 

Well - I'd better be off now. Thanks again for listening.

 

Take care.

 

:book:


Life has become abstract

 

Jill (aka Smudge)

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Christina

I saw the new Harry Potter film a couple of weeks ago and enjoyed it! I haven't read all the books I must admit. I think I've read the first 3 - all to my children when they were younger. Now my daughters are 22 and 19, so shows how long ago that was!

 

Hope you have a grand evening out - sounds like things are looking up. :squiffy:

 

Chris x


Not waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain ....

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Hezza

Hi Jill,

Glad that you've had some good news this week. Hope you enjoy the cinema - my hubby and I loved the film :squiffy:


Life is short. Eat dessert first. Jacques Torres

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jillart

Hi

 

Just dropped in to say I'm still around. Life has quietened down for a while, I'm still off sick. GP says I've got anxiety and depression and has now put meon anti-depressants which I am still getting used to. I've also had an ear infection which I am not sure if it has gone or not yet. I am on so many tablets that I rattle! Hopefully, these will work and I will pick up as the weird thing is that I'm fed up of feeling like this.

 

I am managing to get a few things done and we have a holiday coming up soon at the caravan. Also we should be having our drive done this week, so things are looking positive. I would just like a bit more energy so I can enjoy it more!

 

I will probably have to go back to work next week so I'm not sure how that will effect me - I can pretty much count onme being washed out again, but I have to keep the money coming in and see how far I can stretch the sickness procedures. I've not got long to go now until I can finish work but it will still be very difficult getting there. I have to make it through to next July!

 

Bye for now.

 

:hugs2:


Life has become abstract

 

Jill (aka Smudge)

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Michelle

Keep trucking Jill.

 

 

Michelle :censored:

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